• Child Loss,  Uncategorized

    Child Loss: Who Am I?

    When my son died I no longer knew who I was.  I was lost.  I felt as though half of me was missing.  I felt transparent to the world — like everyone could see right through me and see that my heart was broken and bleeding.  My mind raced and my tears flowed and I cried out to whoever would listen.  “Who am I? I don’t know who I am any more!” And, the truth is that I really didn’t know who I was when my son died.  Was I Samuel’s mom?  Was I still a mother?  Was I an ex-mother?  Who was I?  Suddenly my identity changed and there…

  • Child Loss

    Child Loss: I’m So Lost Without My Child!

    Twenty-four years ago I experienced a pit of grief like I never want to experience ever again.  My son died. The moment Samuel’s soul left this earth, he took part of me with him — a part of my heart and a part of my soul and I knew that those parts of “us” would never return again. I was lost.  And scared.  And felt so alone.  For the first time in my life I didn’t know if I could go on living.